Oh Baby

I am not one to talk about babies or kids. My sincerely STRONG aversion to this topic may even survive the years when I have my own kids. When people ask me how I'm feeling or how the 9 months of engorgement is going, I assume they are just being nice because I can't possibly think of a more boring topic to discuss on the planet. It drives me to snores and I'm the one that is prego. I would much rather discuss Chaucer or defend why I think Thomas Jefferson was a louse and despicable character. I do everything in my power to deflect these types of inquires and steer them into culturally relevant perimeters. Oops. There's the problem- culturally relevant topics in Utah are dominated by kids and babies. I'm doomed to discuss cloth verses disposable forever now aren't I?

There is one child-related topic, however, that I do not and have not shirked from. Even though kids and babies are the farthest thing from my comfortable and pleasurable topics of discussion I prefer list, I have always ALWAYS been a closet European baby products enthusiast. I particularly think the Netherlands region has the best gear on the planet and I have often tried to figure out why American industry can't keep up. Knowing this, you won't be surprised then when I answer my students' question of, "What's the best part about having a kid?" with one of the following answers:

• 1) A socially acceptable excuse to finally wear stretch pants in public every day.
• 2) A legitimate reason to buy European baby gear.

Nope. Not into kids and babies, but put me in front of a bugaboo and I melt with desire. Really don't care to talk about teething or terrible twos. Couldn't care less about varicose veins and common cravings. Get me online at PishPishBaby, however, and I'm all eyes. Weird. I know. Don't like kids, like kid stuff. But I tend to defend my whims with the claim that no, I don't like just any kid stuff, just really well designed kid stuff from Baby Bjorn that would even impress Einstein. You know, the kind of strollers that could fly to the moon if only the radiation from rocket power was safe for the kid.

This isn't a new thing. I'm not one to shift focus just because of little HQ due to grace us with his/her presence in tres meses. I've always been obsessed with top of the line baby gizmos. I guess now I'll just have a kid to blame it on. I'll have you know that I am no late-coming fair-weather enthusiast. I've been setting my sites on BabyVista tech for ages.

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Here are my top picks:

This is the UppaBaby Vista 2010. When Q and I lived in NYC, the Bugaboo was invading the Upper East Side like mosquitos to a blood bank. It was then that I told Q I wouldn't have a kid until I could afford one. Never minding the fact that Bugaboos cost more than the average person's monthly mortgage bill, Q agreed. So why then am I displaying the UppaBaby you ask? Because I love this one even more!!! It's news, it's amazing, it has more tricks than Baskin Robins has flavors, and I bought it with not a moments hesitation when I was told our kid made it through the Brazil tip (albeit he/she may have an extra limb). Suffice it to say that this puppy cost me more than my first car, but I LOVE IT! I think I'm more excited about the stroller than the kid. I take it on test runs around the house and use it to display art in the living room right now. This thing is its own work of art though and now that I know what luxuries await my walks, I'm thinking of buying some new shoes to match!

(Above) This is the rumble seat for a second kid and baby ganoosh for my UppaBaby Vista but I can't afford them yet. No worries. I'm working part time next year so I'll be able to add these to my totally swank collection. Leave it to me to not buy designer clothes only to abandon my frugality for luxury stroller and co.
WATCH MY STROLLER DEMONSTRATION HERE
(gotta love those baby gizmo moms- how can I get in on that action?)
...Oh, and if you're thinking about dipping into your life savings to get one, may I recommend PishPoshBaby.com because they don't charge tax and offer free shipping.

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From IKEA:

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My faves from BabyBjorn:

I am for sure NOT a Target shopper, but online you can get BabyBjorn which is the best event of the 21st century since Smuckers introduced uncrustables. I will not be able to live without any of these. Maybe baby showers aren't so painful after all.

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The ANKA high chair:

(Please oh please Q get some good commissions so I can buy this HERE)

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One last secret wish list item (though not European):


I could sport this Skip Hop Studio Diaper Tote in Pewter Dots even without a baby.

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Wanna see one last thing?


I bought this Pottery Barn Darcy set and got it for less than 50% off the current sale price in PB!!! It even converts to a full. Mom says this is the kind of stuff you get when you wait tell 30 to have a kid. She also says that I'm "small for twins" and hopefully "one of those people who gains all their weight in the beginning" so don't go jumping to conclusions.

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